Sunday, July 21, 2013

I honestly don't know what to put here

So. My mom comes home Tuesday. That's two days. This stresses me out more than basically anything else.

Know what triggers my depression? Stress.

So. Last week was a slow downward spiral until Friday when it sped up. And I started making plans. Real plans. For suicide.

Everything hurts. And the quickest and easiest way to get rid of that hurt is to die.

Don't worry, I've talked to friends and tomorrow I'm going to find a psych ward my insurance will cover and check myself in. If there isn't one....I can't think of that right now.

Part of me is wondering if this is just attention seeking. If it's because I don't want to clean my room, or because I don't want to go to work. But that's not me. Heck, I even went to work Saturday morning. Even feeling like crap.

So, we'll see what happens in the morning. I hope I can find somewhere. Because mental illness is hard enough, trying to deal with insurance is just making me want to give up faster.

1 comment:

  1. Hell's Bells. I am so sorry, and I have been there. And I wish I had read this sooner. And DM me @LaYen if you need.

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